20-something friend: The club opens at nine-thirty, but no one cool shows up until ten-thirty. So let's get there by eleven.
30-something friend: I need to be home by nine-thirty, because the babysitter can only stay until then.
20-something friend: Let's do something fun this weekend! Let's go to that new club/bar/skydiving place!
30-something friend: Let's do something fun this weekend! How about instead of board games, we have a themed potluck dinner?
20-something friend: Oh my God, my boyfriend/girlfriend just did the cutest thing for me! He/she filled up my apartment with flowers/took me out to an expensive restaurant/wrote "I love you" in skywriting with a plane that he/she flew on his/her own!
30-something friend: Oh my God, my spouse just did the sweetest thing for me! He/she did the dishes/folded the laundry/mowed the lawn!
20-something friend: My boyfriend/girlfriend is so adorable. (pulls out phone and shows at least half a dozen pictures of significant other in adorable poses, like the two of them drinking a milkshake with two straws in the same glass.)
30-something friend: My kids are so adorable! (pulls out phone and shows at least a dozen pictures of children in adorable poses, like one where the children have ice cream all over their faces).
20-something friend: I've been at this job for a few months, and I HATE it. Maybe I should go to grad school or take a break, especially because I'm sure my band will make it big sooner rather than later.
30-something friend: I've been at this job for years, and I HATE it. But I can't take a break right now, because I need to take care of my family.
20-something friend: I want an outfit that says, "Come hither, but only if you're the type of person that will text back right away."
30-something friend: I want an outfit that says, "I look ten years younger than I actually am, especially because this 'age-defying' face cream isn't working."
I missed out on a lot of socializing in my twenties, because I was almost always working. I truly regret that, because I feel like I sacrificed my youth and missed out on a lot of fun. But on the rare occasions that I did go out, a few of my friends actually were like that (though we never went skydiving. I don't even like riding the elevator). And after spending the last several years teaching students in their early twenties and hearing them chat with each other, I know for a fact that people in their twenties DO act like that.
Now that I'm in my thirties, my friends are almost exactly like the ones I just described above. Although I usually prefer a quieter life, I must admit that there are a few occasions where I wish I could be in my twenties again and go out dancing until 3 A.M., without having to worry about getting up early for work in the morning. (I could do that now, but my 30-something friends probably wouldn't want to come along, because they'd need to get home early to pay the babysitter, take care of their kids, and maybe take pictures of them with ice cream on their faces.)
What about you? How has socializing changed for you as you got older?
Story Snip from Larksong: Chapter 34, and an Insect Hotel
-
[image: W]
ow!
We're nearing the end of the story.
I'm going to try to post right up until the end of June, which will mark a
full year of sharing snips!...
1 hour ago
Wait, what is socializing? LOL. For me, socializing means having people over for dinner, or hosting epic b-day parties for the kids, or attending a neighborhood party, or church event, or group date. It's different than it was when I was younger, but I rather like it. All things definitely have their seasons.
ReplyDeleteHi Crystal,
DeleteI like dinner parties, especially because one thing I always disliked about 20something parties is that it usually just involved a lot of alcohol and little (or no) food. I just wish that I'd let myself have more time to socialize back then; I remember waking up early to go to work while it seemed like everyone else was still "sleeping off" the night before.
Truthfully, I'd take food over alcohol any day--mostly because I don't drink. *shrugs* I guess that's why my 20's partying was pretty tame. Truthfully, I don't regret that at all. I wish I could give you back your 20's, but I suppose that's the challenge of life: finding joy no matter where we're at.
DeleteI would like any socializing that doesn't involve the teacher's lounge, at any age!
ReplyDeleteHi Charly,
DeleteOh, I know what you mean! Then I could talk about something other than work for a change.
I've missed out on a lot of socializing, but the club scene isn't my thing. Board games and potluck dinners are more my style. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Chrys,
DeleteI was never very comfortable at clubs, but I think I would have had more fun if I'd been self-conscious. The few times I did go out dancing, I remember bumping into drunk people a lot and apologizing over and over. :)
The 30s are all happening to me now in my 20s. I got pregnant with my first at 20, so we rock board game nights. Luckily enough for me, my late teens were wild enough to make me not feel sad about missing out on a stereotypical 20s experience, lol.
ReplyDeleteI hope you get some good socialization time on!
Hi Caitlin,
DeleteMy teen years were not very wild. I think that's one reason I feel nostalgic for my youth sometimes, because I never really got to be wild. I was always very serious (and by that I mean I was a nerd).
I'd say I missed out on a lot of socializing in my 20s. But with depression, introversion, work, school, and marriage, going out was generally a struggle. Now that I'm in my 30s, I'm perfectly OK with admitting that going out isn't my thing. But I often do wonder what my 20s would have been like if I was as confident in myself as I am today. I find myself mourning the young adulthood I didn't have.
ReplyDeleteHi nomdeplume,
DeleteI'm sorry that you didn't get to go out as much as you would have liked. I must admit that during the few times I went out, I didn't feel very confident either. When I went to clubs, I always felt so self-conscious and envious of the people who danced well and could go up and talk to people they didn't know.
I, like you, didn't do a lot of socializing in my 20s. And I might've sounded like your friend in your 30s when I was in my 30s. I guess I never had a big going out time.
ReplyDeleteHi Theresa,
DeleteSorry about my late response! I must admit that on the occasions I did go out in my 20s, I wasn't half as wild as the 20-somethings that were portrayed on TV. Mostly I just remember feeling self-conscious in clubs and bars. :)