Monday, September 15, 2014

I Wish I Was Brave Enough...

1. To point and shriek "SHAME!" at the guy who served me cold pizza but offered to personally reheat the pizza slice of the girl behind me, who happened to be ten years younger and twenty pounds thinner than I am.

2. To tell my ex-crush how hurt and angry I felt when I showed up for what I thought was a date, only to find out he'd invited several of his friends to join us and then to sit there and listen to him tell me all about the woman he had a crush on (needless to say, it wasn't me).

3. To go up and talk to one of the cute guys at the gym where I work out, none of whom ever look at me, except the time I tripped over my shoelaces and fell face-down on an exercise mat.

4. To tell my relatives that there's nothing wrong with me just because I'm not a wife, a mother, or a "real" doctor.

5. To wear a swimsuit without keeping myself covered up with a towel or five feet of water the entire time.

6. To show my writing to more people.

7. To tell "friends" how I don't want to keep hearing about how much fun they have with their other friends, especially because they never invite me to join them.

8. To tell the other grad students who brag about fellowships, publications, and conference presentations that even though I haven't accomplished as much in academia as they have, they probably wouldn't last a day working at any of the retail jobs that I had.

9. To lock the classroom door so that the students who think it's okay to waltz in thirty (or forty) minutes late will learn to show up on time from now on.

10. To tell students' parents who complain about my rules or try to bully me into changing their kids' grades that it's time that they AND their kids GREW UP.

11. To tell the students who never taught a day in their lives yet claim that they can do my job better than I can that I wish I could be there when they try to treat their bosses with the same blatant disrespect.

12. To tell the people who hurt me that what they did WAS wrong, even though they show absolutely no remorse or act like they never did anything wrong at all.

Here's Sara Bareilles' song "Brave", which made me think of all the things that I wish I was brave enough to say out loud:

What about you? What do you wish you were brave enough to do?


  1. I feel your rant here.

    The "real" doctor line made me laugh. I was watching The Simpsons the other day, and when Sideshow Bob introduces himself as a doctor, he's asked, "A real doctor." He lowers his voice as he replies, "No."

    1. Hi Theresa,
      I love Sideshow Bob, especially because Kelsey Grammer voices the character. A lot of people think that people with PhDs don't have the right to call themselves "Dr." because they didn't go to med school. But I will definitely refer to myself as "Dr." when I get my PhD.

  2. It is SO frustrating when people do jerky things and then are totally clueless about it. I usually let this stuff slid too and then get mad at myself - but mostly I think that saying something wouldn't make any difference anyway, so why bother?

    Sorry about what happened w/ your clueless crush. Glad to see you've added the "ex".

    1. Hi Nicki,
      You're right that it probably wouldn't make any difference; people like that would either deny it or try to blame me for their own actions. It's better just to stay away from them.
      Out of all the scenarios I'd pictured for that outing with that guy, what actually happened was not one of them.

  3. I love this song. I sing along out loud whenever I hear it. I feel like you can read my mind, because i wish I was a lot braver too and that i could have the courage to stand up to people who are being mean and don't think there's anything wrong with it.

    I really hope you will have a great week and that your students can grow up and stop giving you crap.

    1. Hi Murees,
      I love that song too; Sara Bareilles is one of my favorite musicians. One thing about teaching is that I have learned to stand up for myself a lot more than I did before I was a teacher; I don't let students walk all over me. I wish I could lock the door so that tardy students can't come in; maybe then students would learn that class doesn't start "whenever".

  4. Great list!

    Number 10 in particular gets my hair up. As a child I NEVER got sympathy if I blamed a teacher for something (....even if it was true....) and I can't imagine a member of my family calling a school to bully a teacher. Deplorable.

    I'd encourage you to lock the door, but it might be a fire hazard or something. You should embarrass them instead; hang a bell on the door, or put something near it that will knock it over, so it makes tremendous noise and everybody stares at them silently as they make their way to a seat.

    1. Hi Jennifer,
      Fortunately, only a few of my students' parents have contacted me; it still surprised me nonetheless when they did. After all, these students are supposed to be adults now; can you imagine if their parents called their future bosses to complain?
      I laughed at your description of the bell on the door; I wish I could do that, but then that bell would ring so many times!

  5. Beware the helicopter parents. The trend is growing. I'm not very brave either, but I write about women who are. They do the things I'd like to be brave enough to do.

    1. Hi Carol,
      I like your description of how you write about brave women; I can definitely relate to that. I often think of comebacks that I wish I had said, only it's too late to say them; I then include them in some of my stories.
      It's true that there are many helicopter parents. They don't realize that it's better to let their kids be more independent; that way the kids will make an easier transition to adulthood.