Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Getting Revenge by Writing

The thing about being completely neurotic is that you obsess over everything, including the things that don't bother most people. (That's why I love Seinfeld. It's not really "a show about nothing". It's a show about their obsessions.) That can cause you to hold grudges that last for a long time.

For example, I am still angry at the Walgreens cashier that I bought M&Ms from back in high school. She made a crack about how I shouldn't eat too much candy because it was fattening. I'd bought candy from her before, and I guess she thought she was being "helpful". This was back when I was overweight and self-conscious about my appearance.  I knew the candy was fattening. Overweight people know that they shouldn't eat junk food, and they know that they're overweight. But sometimes they just can't help themselves, and it's humiliating when other people make them feel bad about it. I still remember how embarrassed, hurt, and angry I felt, and to this day I wish I had stood up to her...or at least called the manager over to file a complaint against her. So even though it's been more than a decade since that happened, I still cannot bring myself to forgive her.

I do try to forgive people, even though it's hard. But in fiction writing, however, I can be as vengeful and unforgiving as I want to be. That makes me sound cruel, but think about it. A lot of fiction writers write down the things they would never say in real life, or they let their characters do what the writers could/would never do. It's safer that way, and it can provide a sense of release as well. Rather than seek revenge in real life against the people that hurt you, you can do it through writing, as long as you heavily disguise those people, of course, as Anne Lamott advised in her book Bird by Bird. (Otherwise, they might seek revenge against you, by filing a lawsuit.)

For example, the other night, I noticed that the neighbor in the apartment one floor up and facing mine raised his blinds at around midnight. I didn't think anything of it until I went to bed at around twelve-thirty. Even though my blinds were closed, the light from my neighbor's apartment shone into mine. He must have used flood lights or 100-megawatt bulbs, because the light completely lit up my room. In my half-asleep state, I at first thought that a UFO had landed outside my window, and I was going to yell out my window, "Take my neighbors, not me! Feel free to dissect and study them, as long as you don't bring them back."

But then I looked out my window and realized that it was the light in my neighbor's apartment that made it seem like it was still broad daylight rather than the middle of the night. I tried to go back to sleep, but the light made it impossible. How long did the jerk leave his light on? All night. What time did I finally manage to fall asleep? Four A.M. What time did I have to get up to go to work? Seven A.M. On a scale of one to ten, how angry (and exhausted) was I? 999,765,037...and counting.

In fiction, I can get back at him by writing a horror story titled "Night of the Living Workaholic", where I turn into a zombie (which, actually, is what happens when I don't get enough sleep) and come into his apartment, where Zombie Me then proceeds to a) eat his brain or b) scare him into being polite and considerate, to the point that not only will he keep his blinds closed from now on, he'll be too afraid to leave his home and will keep peeking through his blinds for fear that Zombie Me will strike again (and I will, BWAHAHAHAHA!).

In real life, I bought a sleeping mask to cover my eyes. If he is inconsiderate enough to leave his blinds up and his lights on all night again, I will ask my landlord to say something to him, though I doubt it will make much difference.

More than once people have pushed me aside in their hurry to get on the train during my daily commute. In real life, all I can say is, "Hey, I was here FIRST, so BACK UP!" If I'm feeling more timid, then I'll just give them what I call the Death Glare and hope that they will cower in fear. (I also kind of wish that Zombie Me could be my bodyguard, because she would definitely scare them...or eat their brains.)

But in fiction, I can get back at them by writing a story about how after they cut in front of a line of people waiting for the train, they find themselves trapped on a train full of Justin Bieber's fans on their way to a concert.

What about you? Do you ever base your characters or storylines on people or situations that bothered you? Do you ever write in fiction what you wish would happen in real life? If you don't, how do you work out your emotions when someone makes you mad or hurts you? 

18 comments:

  1. Usually I write about what I'm feeling in diary form first, because that's a good way of judging a situation. In fiction I certainly include traits from the people that have bothered me, but not a specific situation. (Not yet, anyway.)

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    1. Hi Rachel,
      Writing in a diary can definitely be a good place to express how you feel and what you think; that's one reason why I usually carry my journal with me. And sometimes venting, even if it's just with pen and paper, can be enough to make me feel better.

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  2. This post reminds me of an article written about John Irving that talked about one of his first books and how people recognized many of the characters and felt they were pulled straight from life. I think it's very common and fine as long as you create them with a tweak so as to avoid lawsuits.

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    1. Hi Johanna,
      I've been to several readings given by people who wrote memoirs; I've always wanted to ask them what the people in their lives thought of those memoirs, particularly the people who were cast in a negative light. But I never had the courage to ask them.
      At least in fiction I can base stories on real-life events or people, but with a "tweak", as you say. One of my favorite TV shows is Law and Order, and they often do episodes that are "ripped from the headlines"; however, they always change certain aspects of the real events and make the stories their own, so to speak.

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    1. Hi Karen,
      I figure that revenge by writing is better than revenge by water balloons or revenge by whoopee cushions. :)

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  4. I've never thought of it this way before, and I might just give it a try *insert evil laughter* ;-)

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    1. Hi Irene,
      You should try it! It's a good way to figure out or express how you feel without getting into a disagreement with anyone; on paper, you can figure out how to address or resolve that conflict.

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  5. Ah, I hate it when cashiers remark about my purchases. I have a sweet tooth, so whenever they say, "who's all the candy for" I tell them "ME, and I'm not sharing." That shuts them up real quick.

    Now I want to write an annoying cashier character...

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    1. Hi Emily,
      When I was overweight, I used to like to go to Cinnabon. But I stopped going after the cashiers laughed at me and made rude comments for going there so often; I hated them for hurting my feelings and acting like it didn't matter. I like your comeback about the candy. I wish I had said something like that to those mean cashiers.

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  6. I think I take a few traits off the people that bother me in real life. But not too much because I don't need the drama if one day I actually get published :)

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    1. Hi Jessie,
      You're right that including too many traits from people would result in too much drama. Taking just a few traits, however, is safer. Not to mention a lot of people share the same traits, so people are less likely to recognize themselves.

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  7. I don't usually take revenge in my writing, but I guess that's because the best villains are sympathetic, and real life jerks aren't. However, a neighbour has a beagle that barks all night. I love dogs. I have dogs. My dogs do not behave like angels, but at least I put a stop to it if they bark or do the wrong thing. I did write a short story in the morning about a woman who was dead for several days and the neighbours only called the cops when the dog stopped barking. They thought that was odd.

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    1. Hi Charmaine,
      I love dogs too, which is why I feel sorry for your neighbor's beagle; that neighbor needs to pay more attention to his or her dog, and then the dog would most likely not bark half as much. That story you wrote sounds interesting; it's also sad about what happens to that woman.

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  8. It is neat to absolutely get to say all the things you wish or didn't say thru your writing! Revenge is candy sweet...in writing that is!

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    1. Hi Tammy,
      I think that one reason it's easier to say what you want to say through writing is because you can go back and rewrite it, unlike in real life. You can also develop the scene so that it ends up the way you would have wanted it to end, unlike real life, which is so unpredictable.

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  9. Sure, I've used ideas for my writing. I try to change them enough, and I'm sure I also do it without even being conscious of it.

    I remember having a problem sleeping during Christmas when my neighbor across the street was a little too light happy.

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    1. Hi Theresa,
      My neighbor has raised his blinds and left his lights on for a long time again...and again. But now I have my sleeping mask, and it helps. And he doesn't always leave his blinds up all night, so that helps too.
      I think I read somewhere that writing is a good way to release all those emotions that we keep to ourselves. At times it can be a relief.

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