Free Writing Advice

When I was on okcupid last year, I got an e-mail from a guy that made me want to break things and start primal screaming. The guy wasn't interested in a date with me; he wanted to send me his manuscript so that I could critique it for him, because he saw in my profile that I was an English teacher. But he didn't say anything about paying me. I think he just assumed that I'd be willing to review a stranger's work for free.

I mean, really? Did he really think that that's why I joined a dating site? Sure. I didn't become a member so that I could go on dates. I joined so that I could review manuscripts for comma splices and run-ons and give free writing advice, because it's not like I don't get ENOUGH of that by teaching freshman composition and literature classes. Yes, I just love grading papers SO MUCH that I just want to help everyone! Yay!! I can hardly stop clapping my hands with joy! Who needs a social life when I have grammar to keep me company!

When I worked in retail, several of my coworkers were college students. Whenever they found out that I was an English major/grad student/writing teacher, some of them would say, "Could I e-mail you my paper? Do you think you could tell me what I should do to fix it so that I can get an A?" (Incidentally, this is similar to what many of my own students say; they want me to "edit" their papers and tell them exactly what to write so that they can get A's. Every time one of my students asks me this, they get a big lecture from me on how important it is for them to learn how to write without someone else putting all the words in their heads. Sometimes, I also start primal screaming.)

Does this ever happen to you? When people find out that you write, do they start asking you for help with their own writing? How do you respond?

Often I hear of writers exchanging manuscripts for review, or joining writer's groups so that they can discuss ideas. I think that that's great, and someday I'd like to join a writer's group too, once I'm not working two or three jobs while attending graduate school. I've also reviewed a writer friend's work, and it was cool because I got to read a story that no one else had read before. I've also read some great blogs where writers will give awesome writing advice, and I love that because it gives me motivation for my own writing.

But it's another thing altogether where people will just expect me to give them free writing advice just because I happen to teach writing. I don't mind helping my own students, because obviously, that's my job. And I do like that point when their eyes light up when they finally "get it". Then I get to see the difference in their writing because they applied to it what they learned from me.

But I have to review dozens of papers every week, in addition to all of the other work I have to do. So when I finish my work for the day, the last thing I want to do is look at yet another paper. I always used to hear lawyers complain about people who tried to get them to give free legal advice, and doctors complain about people who tried to get them to give free medical advice. And now I can sympathize with them. Because I think that the people who ask are missing the point, especially when it comes to writing. Part of the writing process is learning how to write, even (and especially) if it includes making mistakes.

And besides, even a workaholic like me needs to relax. But not for too long, of course.

Side note: I got two cool awards this week: the Versatile Blogger award from OfficeGirl, who writes the great blog Tired but Writing, and the Who's Awesome award from KarenG, who writes the wonderful blog Coming Down the Mountain: From Reclusive Writer to Published Author. Thanks again, guys! You made my week! And everyone should definitely check out their blogs.