Tuesday, October 6, 2015

What I'd Like to Say to My Students

I don't like waking up this early either. But if I can't go back to sleep during class, then neither can YOU.

You don't become invisible when you take a nap during class. I CAN SEE YOU, so WAKE UP.

Your followers on Instagram and Twitter will understand if you don't post anything for a whole hour. In fact, I'm willing to bet THEY WON'T CARE, so put your phone away.

It is not my job to give you an A. It is your job to earn one.

If you want to be treated like an adult, then don't let your parents e-mail me to complain about your grades.

You do realize that your fancy cell phones come with clocks, right? So why do you keep showing up to class a half hour late?

I think it's great that you enjoy your friends' company. I don't think it's great that you feel the need to text them seventy-five times an hour.

If you want to see my head explode, then say, "I know I missed a month of class, but I think I should have gotten at least a B."

Sometimes it seems like what I tell you doesn't even go in one ear and out the other, because you refuse to take out your headphones.

I know that you're shy and afraid of sounding foolish in front of your classmates and me. But it's better to say the wrong thing than to sit there for the entire class every day and never say anything. At least the people who speak up are trying.

If you're going to claim that you have a "family emergency" and can't come to class, then don't stick around on campus afterwards, where I can easily see you hanging out with your friends.

You complain that authors like Mary Shelley, Maxine Hong Kingston, and William Shakespeare are boring, but I really don't see how your friends' Instagram posts about what they had for lunch are much more interesting.

If you're not going to do the reading, pay attention in class, answer any of my questions, turn in the work on time (or at all), or show up on time (or at all), then why are you in this class?

Threatening to get me fired, e-mailing complaints to the chair of my department, screaming at me in my office, or stomping out during the middle of class are NOT going to get me to change your grades (and yes, all of these things have happened).

When your writing improves, when you talk about the characters in the stories that we're studying as if they're real people, or when you tell me that you read other works by the authors just because you liked them so much, you make my day.

Last year, when I declined a teaching job and took out a student loan in order to finish my dissertation, I didn't miss teaching. I enjoyed being free from eight A.M. classes, grade complaints from students (and their parents), and e-mails from students who wrote stuff like, "Sorry I missed the last eight classes. Can you just e-mail me what I missed?"

I still love teaching, but there are still parts of it that drive me up the wall. I can't help thinking that I wouldn't be such a neurotic workaholic if I had chosen another career. But I've been so focused on getting my Ph.D. and becoming a college professor that I've lost sight of almost everything else. I can't even imagine what else I'd do (other than write, though I'd still need a day job), and I'm still not willing to give up everything I've worked for.

At the same time, I REALLY wish I could put this post on my syllabus, because the more frustrated I feel, the more nostalgic I get for the one year when I didn't have to teach.

What about you? Do you ever feel burned out or frustrated at your job? Have you ever had second thoughts about your chosen career? If you could say something to college students from this generation, what would you say? 

17 comments:

  1. Wow, some of your students should challenging! They'll be in for a shock when they start work, with that sense of entitlement...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Annalisa,
      I know, right? Unfortunately, many young people from today's generation have a strong sense of entitlement; I think it's part of that "everyone gets a trophy" mentality. I WISH I could be there when they start working full-time. Those types of habits don't just go away; I'd like to hear what the employers have to say to these kids when they finally grow up.

      Delete
  2. As part of my duties as an adjunct at a small state university I teach a 1-credit seminar to freshman on adjusting to college. I tackle a lot of these issues in the seminar. The following are some of the titles of my lectures for this.
    1) How to write an email to your professor without being a jerk or an asshole (this touches on the "did I miss anything?" emails, the emails without a question and/or task, not using proper grammar/punctuation, and not addressing professors correctly)
    2) Time Management (or why your cell phone should stay in your dorm room) in which I bitch about modern technology for 45 minutes, including data on how multitasking is a myth and how computers/tablets in the classroom are a distraction for not just the student with the technology, but for everyone in the classroom
    3) The importance of sleep in which I show them stats about how sleep impacts learning and reflexes and then stats about how much the average person and average college student sleeps and then have them do menial tasks that half of them can't do because they're too sleep deprived.

    This seminar has made me so happy. I get to essentially TELL freshman all of the above and THEY PAY ME FOR IT.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi NGS,
      You're so lucky! I wish I could teach a seminar like that! That should be a required course at every school. I especially like the part about how to write e-mails; it always irritates me when students start their e-mails not by saying "Dear" but "Hey." And time management is a valuable skill; it would make things so much easier on me if everyone turned in their work on time. It bothers me that some (though not all) students don't (or won't) even do the bare minimum. Some of them won't even stay awake during class, and then they complain when they don't get A's.

      Delete
  3. LOL! Yes. Okay, so welcome to parenthood, except you can't ever quit that one. Writing, I can back away from if I need space...and try to ignore all the impending deadlines, but ultimately I realize this was my career of choice. I could have gone the music angle and landed all kinds of work for studios, commercial entities, and even teaching. I think I'm happier with this path.

    I did rather chuckle at some of those antics. Others are just sad. The kids of this generation are significantly less responsible than those of the past.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Crystal,
      Sometimes I do feel like a parent, except I skipped over the years when the college kids were adorable babies and right to the difficult teen years.
      It really is sad that some students act like this; I never would have even considered doing any of these things when I was a student. I think it's harder for me to relate to kids today because I wasn't raised the way they were. One thing that bothers me is that even some parents don't make their kids take responsibility for their own work, which is why they occasionally e-mail me to pressure me to change their kids' grades or excuse them from class. How will these kids ever grow up if their parents keep doing everything for them?

      Delete
  4. My favorite response to all student complaints is "And so the world comes to a dead stop."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Charly,
      I like that! I think I might try borrowing your phrase the next time I hear a complaint from a student.

      Delete
  5. Wow, you are a saint. I would probably have blown my lid with these students already. I bet you can't lock them out of class, if they are late, hah? Someone would probably complain about that and get you in trouble as well.

    When people text in class, or give me attitude, I would give an evil grin and say "Oh, I can't wait to grade your papers. I bet that will be very entertaining." And hopefully that student fails:) Okay, now I'm jut being mean. Wishing you luck and tons of patience.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Murees,
      Just in case you're wondering why you can't find my blog, I changed the blog address to weirdworkaholic.blogspot.com. (Long story, I'll explain later). I wish I could lock students out of class, but I'd probably get in trouble for that.
      Teaching is definitely a test of patience; sometimes I feel like I'm running out of it.

      Delete
  6. I think every teacher has wanted to say these things and can relate to this. There's so much good that comes out of being a teacher but so many headaches as well. I've always admired teachers and their commitment. You're amazing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Chrys,
      I changed my blogger URL to weirdworkaholic.blogspot.com. And thanks! I've been committed to teaching, but sometimes I must admit that it's harder to stay committed. I try to remind myself that it's worth it in the end.

      Delete
  7. I think every teacher has wanted to say these things and can relate to this. There's so much good that comes out of being a teacher but so many headaches as well. I've always admired teachers and their commitment. You're amazing!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I wish more teachers (and parents!) were firm with their students. Grade grubbing while slacking off bothered me even when I was a fellow student! I always remember my great aunt telling the story of how she once turned away a student (back in the 50s) who showed up to class with her hair still wet from her shower!

    I had one class I used to fall asleep in. I felt so badly, but the class was at 8 am, I used to stay up too late reading, and it was an advanced-level German history class with a little old man professor with a quiet steady voice. The material was very interesting, but the conditions were all wrong. There were only 12 students in the class, the professor insisted on quiet -- and he wouldn't let us bring in tea or coffee or even water!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Deniz,
      I think that one reason that more teachers aren't firm with their students is because the parents often object to it; I often read news articles about how parents threw fits because the teachers dared to discipline their kids. That's interesting about your great aunt; I wonder what she'd think of the students who show up to class in their pajamas!
      Your professor should have let you bring coffee at least, especially since it was an early class. Then it might have been easier for all of you to concentrate.

      Delete
  9. This entry says most of the things I have wanted to say in some form or another! I will say though that I am starting to feel some burn-out from teaching for some of the reasons you listed. I also get tired of not having enough time for myself to read or enjoy anything because I'm always grading gosh-awful essays. The struggle is real.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Catherine,
      Grading is very tiring, especially when you have to read essays on the same topic for hours on end. I haven't had much time to read anything other than students' essays either, and I haven't been able to write anything other than comments on their essays. I always feel happier when I'm able to spend more time reading and writing fiction.

      Delete