Monday, August 31, 2015

Culture Shock

Whenever I tell people that I moved to Small Town, Tennessee from Chicago, they say, "Well! That must be a big change for you! Do you like it here?"

That's not an easy question to answer. On the one hand, it is nice to walk around without random guys yelling lewd things at me or trying to grope me, like they did on the streets of Chicago. Here in Small Town one day, some guys driving a pickup truck pulled up next to me when I was waiting to cross the street and yelled, "God bless you!" And I thought, WTF?

Here are some things I've observed about Small Town so far:

The drivers in this town might as well refer to themselves as "Tailgating is my middle name."

Only the devil's children go out after nine P.M. (which is why everything closes by then, except the bars) or drive faster than 25 mph in the left lane.

Several people in this town want to shake hands with Donald Trump (I try not to scream in terror or run in the opposite direction when they tell me this).

"Hon," "honey," "ma'am," and "y'all" are Southerners' favorite words (because everyone has a Southern accent).

Many of the girls at the school where I teach wear pearls and skirts to class, and several of the boys drive pickup trucks with Confederate flag license plates.

Several of the students have gun collections and enjoy hunting or fishing.

Apparently even the younger people in this town think they'll live longer if they walk (and drive) as slowly as possible.

I've started swearing a lot more (with the windows rolled up in my car so no one can hear me) ever since I moved here.

The only way to cook meat is to fry it or barbecue it.

Many people have wide front porches with rocking chairs and porch swings, which makes it easier for them to sit outside and wave to newcomers like me while gossiping about them.

Spitting in public isn't rude. It's just common sense.

People in this town also apparently have the motto, "Why give a straightforward answer to a question, when I can take ten minutes to answer it?"

In Chicago, people are all, "Don't look at me don't look at me don't look at me BACK OFF!" But here in Small Town, I can't go anywhere without people staring at me and making comments under their breath, because it's pretty clear that I'm not from here.

This place is pretty much the opposite of Chicago. I can't help wondering when or if this place will ever feel like home, especially since I still miss Chicago terribly.

What about you? Have you ever felt like an outsider in a place that you visited or lived in, or have you ever experienced culture shock?

15 comments:

  1. I'm sorry things are still tough. It doesn't sound too bad. At least it sounds safer? I felt like that when I went to New Zealand. Everything was so different. The hardest part for me was the food. I couldn't get the kind of food I loved, which was tough, because South Africans like flavorful food. Where as New Zealanders don't really like spices, or bold flavors. Even the McDonald's there tasted different.

    I hope the teaching is going well. The students sound less disrespectful. Hoping things get better for you soon.

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    1. Hi Murees,
      The students here are definitely different from the ones I taught in Chicago; I'll write more about them in future posts. The food is definitely one reason I miss Chicago a lot; what I wouldn't give for a bag of Garrett's popcorn and a slice of Chicago-style pizza right now. That's interesting to learn that New Zealanders don't like spicy or bold flavors; someday, I'll go there and try the food too.

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  2. Haha...welcome to the South. While I live in Dallas, a modern, diverse metropolis, I definitely still see a lot of that here. I'm not a southerner, although I've been here since I was a kid, so I can definitely appreciate what you must be going through. All I can say is, use this as an opportunity to get some experience under your belt and then get the hell out!

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    1. Hi nomdeplume,
      I've never been to Dallas (or anywhere in Texas, actually), but I'd like to go someday; I've heard it's an interesting, lively city. I definitely don't intend to stay in Small Town, TN forever; at the very least, my stay here will most likely end up being a learning experience, even if I don't like it.

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  3. You moved to a small town?? I obviously have been a bad blogger lately, seeing as I did not know this. How small of a town are we talking? (I'm so nosy. See, I'm from a small town.) ;)
    My small town is up north, though, so no ya'lls or spitting. (Ew.)
    I hope you find a way to enjoy your small town, or find yourself back in a bigger one soon! :)

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    1. Hi Rachel,
      I moved to a small town in Tennessee because I got a job at a college here; the jobs were harder to come by in Illinois, especially due to the state budget snafu going on right now. The town I live in is so small that it basically takes no more than 5-10 minutes to drive anywhere in town. I don't know if I'll ever enjoy living here, but hopefully it won't feel so strange to me after a while.

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    2. I can see how a small town would be a big adjustment. My home town has a population of about 2500. There is nothing to do here. But it has its advantages too. I hope you end up liking it! :)

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  4. Oh, the sloooowness. Even just going a couple of hours in any direction away from the Chicago metro area I notice a huge difference in the pace. I'm sure that's the reason for your increased swearing.

    It may never come to feel like home, but I'm sure you'll adjust. I've been chain watching Gilmore Girls on Netflix - it puts a charming spin on small town life (though on the East Coast, not South) and the gossipy, wacky characters, so maybe watching that would help make it all more amusing.

    At any rate, you're gathering excellent experience to one day write a fantastic story about a city girl out of water in a small Southern town. When my sister first moved to London and was experiencing major culture shock, she worked out a lot of her anxiety through a parallel fictional character.

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    1. Hi Nicki,
      The slow drivers are definitely why I've been swearing more often; I don't think that some of them understand that they're actually supposed to drive faster in the left lane. Just yesterday I found myself driving behind someone going 12 mph!
      I like the town in Gilmore Girls; I wish the small town I was living in was like that. I do love your idea about writing a story about a city girl out of water; that's definitely me right now, because I'm still not used to how they do things around here.

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  5. Welcome to a slower pace of life! I faced some of that when we moved from NYC to upstate NY. It was a refreshing change. Give yourself some time to adjust, but you'll eventually appreciate many of the differences. Neither place is better. They're just different.

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    1. Hi Crystal,
      Hopefully I will appreciate the differences once I've lived here longer. I think one reason it's been difficult for me to adjust is that earlier this summer I'd given up hope that I would find a full-time teaching job; that's why I thought I would have one more year in Chicago at least. I got this job less than a month before I moved down here, so I didn't get enough time to "say goodbye" to Chicago.

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  6. Gosh, I've always wanted to live in a small town but you're starting to make me second guess that. I hope things start getting better for you!

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    1. Hi Chrys,
      I think it depends on where the small town is located and what it's like there. There are positive aspects to small town life, but I must admit that as a longtime former city dweller I'm biased against it.

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  7. When we moved to Utah I felt like an outsider for about 4 years. We lived there for over 20 and had a nice life but I can't say it ever felt like home. Sometimes you live in a place for the experience and growth it can provide you, not because it feels comfortable or even like you belong.

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    1. Hi Karen,
      I think you're right. I doubt that this place will ever truly feel like home, especially since I'm not sure how long I'll be here; I'm an untenured faculty member, so the situation is pretty uncertain right now. But maybe the experience will turn out to be valuable; at the very least, as several people have pointed out, it will give me something to write about.

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